I wouldn't trust us with your book,
but you might be desperate.
Figures & False Data
Our highly adroit altruistic amatory fashion is bellicose while sometimes calamitous. Defamation while egregious is not intentionally fulsome. Though our garrulousness may seem guileless, it is unreservedly petulant banter.
Chavi BunsonCreative Director
Chavi is a prize winning author when people stopped reading books and turned to YouTube for entertainment he thought, "What's the point?" That's when he came to work for Millenia.
Trudi MayonnaiseDistribution Specialist
Trudi makes a mean BLT so primarily that's why we keep her around. Distribution is really all automated and outsourced. But hey if we can afford to keep her we will.
Jeff ReginsBrand Director
Jeff did 27 years at ITT Tech but jumped ship when he learned things were heading south. We picked him up and now he's bossing the branding department around. He's one happy guy.
It's clear to see just how seriously these guys need help. I mean who writes this stuff? This cannot be taken seriously. It only furthers the dumbing down of America. Someone buy me a juice box. I need a juice box.
Mom! Stop writing about our homelife and putting it out for the world to read! How am I ever going to be taken seriously? I hate you! By the way, I need $850 for rent, and my car insurance is coming up for renewal.
I go to bed each night with the terror of what path is being laid before me. How can people be this messed up in the head. Where they dropped on the head? Have I been dropped on the head? Someone tell me it's going to be okay.